Well, as the whole world knows, I am the most accomplished person in history, with many world records and supernatural powers. But the main attraction of my circus of fame is my communist island, Navetopia. The Island is almost the size of India, but holds a total of 4 billion people. All of my citizens are of the Navican religion, and those who aren't are persecuted in the many torture chambers that we have in our torture facility in Downtown Navetopia. Anyone who speaks out against our government is tickle tortured, and I personally do the tickling (Me and Mao are best buds). But this island came to be one day when I was 3: and that's when my life became extra-extra extraordinary.
At the age of 3, I had already assasinated my parents and …
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